THE LUCK OF THE IRISH

A friend of mine once told me: "My wife and I had words - but, I didn't get to use mine."

Another friend of mine recently had the gall to suggest there were few words I had left unused.

Many men, while happily married, have words they never get to use. That may well be the reason they are happily married.

A popular saying is: "God made man before women so as to give him time to think of an answer for her first question."

Once we recognize that the sexes are truly different and stop trying to erase that difference we start to take some positive steps.

It is well known that man's biggest problem -when a woman tells him she has a problem- is to offer advice as to how the problem can be resolved.

This huge failing generally results in the words: "You never listen to me."

I say, "C'mon. Cut the guy a break. You readily admit to this "love of your life" (the home repair challenged one) that he can't walk and chew gum at the same time. Despite this, you don't really understand why he hasn't mastered listening , thinking, and talking all at the same time?"

Women are different. They tend to just keep talking, and make several practice runs, knowing, " in there somewhere is the thing for which I'm really ticked off."

And, that's okay. We all have our own style.

Occasionally, it occurs to me:"I may have overreached in attempting to get in touch with my feminine side!"

But, is there any happy couple who hasn't learned that it takes much less time for two to look for glasses, keys, a missing phone number and the remote; once they have developed a system and divided the responsibilities as well as determining the "usual suspects" hiding places?

When you get older don't you also recognize it takes two people to replace the missing screw in one pair of glasses?

If any - or all of this - seems to make sense - I shake my head in surprise.

You see, it's St. Paddy's Day, my McDonalds doesn't sell Shamrock Shakes, and I'm feeling really "discomboobulated".

Folks, have a Happy St. Patricks Day - and tell yourself -" Self, this is one St. Patty's Day I'm not getting hauled off in the Paddy Wagon!"