High School Reunion

Anybody out there been receiving invitations to attend high school reunions?

Also, are there any of you who might go but the destination for the reunion is not something tht fits conveniently into your budget - or you have conficting
commitments like watching a grandchild participating in a marbles tournament that weekend?

Hey, these are all valid reasons for this writer.

But, what if the real reason is that you really weren't a big deal in high school  - maybe even thought of as a nerd - and in your eyes you believe that not much probably changed in the minds of your former classmates after you graduated?

Hey, things may have changed. It happens. But, do you really want to have to use the occasion of a 25, 30,  40 or 50 year reunion to "find out"?

Probably not.

I responded to a few of these reunion invitations by making an innocent comment or two that apparently was not received as same. that was pretty much it for me. Sameo - Sameo.

Do you ever wonder why when those invitations to "reunions" arrive in your mailbox or computer, they never seem to come from a former class member who now says:

"Hey, I know I  really was a true jagoff back then but now that my 3rd arrest for statuary rape has been dismissed I would love to get together with you guys - over at Vinny's Pizza and Car Wash Emporion" back  in our home town - where I have finally found employment."

No, the ones I get are from a guy who makes self important allusions to titles, awards - the number of residences - the exotic trips etc that God has blessed him with.

 Don't get me wrong - I truly do not wish them retirement status as a possible ex-felon nor as an entry level employee at the Pizza and Car Wash location.

Neither do I want to attend a reunion so I can be reminded of their personality inadequacies both in High School and now as a fellow senior.

OK, let's take a vote. Anything like that really take place with you since your high school graduation? Hmmm, not an overwhelming show of hands

Probably not  - and that's okay. I guess this is just my own personal peeve and at my age I kinda figure I have a right to express it - in my own personal blog.

Probably - if you were not a member of the desired clique in your high school days - those invitations sent asking you to "reunion'  are coming from somebody who mysteriously - back in the days -  could  never  find the time to talk to you.

 That is unless he or she asked you to do their homework, vote for them in some school office election, or accused you of taking or putting something in their locker.

There's a distinct possibility that you've really grown up tremendously - lost that inferiority complex along with the acne - but still go:

"Is this trauma something that I really want to renew? I mean, it was only after I escaped from this peer pressure  and three months later went away to college. I had truly moved on and found who I was all about. When I did that I acquired the self-confidence I needed and recognized the potential that I had but which was never realized while in high school."

Honestly, those two years after I graduated from high school and went away to school before transferring to a school in my hometown were maybe the best two years of my life.

 I was like a flower that had blossomed. I went from "nerd' status to "Cheers" status - where, maybe not everybody - but most of my college class mates knew my name and actually spoke to me.

Despite that new recogniton from strangers none of my former high school classmates tried to track me down to have lunch or share a beer with them.

But yet, the current e-mails (and you're wondering how in the name of God they got your e-mail address) that promise you the reunion will be "status free" - a no pressure affair.

See, this means - no possibility that those arranging the reunion will attempt to freeze you out again nor try to remind you that you are still a failure in their eyes or  couldn't possibly match their so-called accomplishments since high school.

I think of it as sort of a reunion "leader board" that posts your scores and lists your comparative position in the reunion tournament.

It's not necessarily unlike retirement status in Florida.

C'mon, lets talk.

The first thing I found that you have to deal with in the retirement community you chose are the questions designed to indentify how you compare with them. You are quickly asked about your past employment  - your accomplishments - your current residence location(s) - and whether or not you belong to a golf/country club in the area or back home.

And, if for some reason or another, you are able to skillfully avoid those questions, (because you're still basically a private person) do not be surprised if someone follows you outside to see the age and model of the vehicle you are driving.

If that sounds truly paranoia driven - please re-enter the real world. Honestly, it actually happens down here - and some graduate work in  a psychology related field  helped me to understand what it was all about.

Some - and definitely not all men - do not know how to relate to other men unless they know if their "superiority index" - can program you adequately on a continuom  as equal - superior - or menial.

 I had achieved some degree of success with a large company but after consistent questioning by a complete stranger aimed at determining the height to which I had risen in this company with which he had some familiarity  - I finally responded to the guy, "Would you like to see my teeth?"

Does this all sound like something from a frustrated high school student who just didn't fit in 50 to 60 years ago?   Yeah, maybe - but there's much more .

I can't possibly imagine why folks who seldom showed any interest in me suddenly recall my name (via Google?) and now want me to "reunion" with them.

Being somewhat of a cynic I ask myself this question "Is there  a quorum goal these folks are desperately trying to meet similar to the votes they accumulated for class treasurer that is contingent on the number of people who respond to their entreaty and actually show up at the reunion?"

It's hard to imagine that these fine folks who contact us only in 10 year increments have had an epiphany and now want to know what we are all about in our old age?

Or, based on remarks from some friends who did cave in and attend their respective high schol reunions I wonder - based on their stories of regret- is this  really "about" the "inviters"  desire to see you or tell  you what they're all "about"?

Obviously, from what I've written, you have gathered this is possibly not an overwhelming bucket list goal for me.


It's simply that I didn't want to play the game almost 60 years ago. I purposely did not  dress like they did - get the requisite crew cut -  talk the talk - drink the brew -smoke the hemp (or anything else) - wear the bucks - the button down sport shirts with the signature button in the back - the crew neck sweaters  or the the  khaki's with the belt in the back.

Of course, within a month after graduating I did most of those things.

Do you think that had anything to do with my new found popularity in college?

Anyway, it's been a good journey.

 I have a lot that I'm proud of - good kids - an attractive loving wife  - receipt of some  praise - awards etc - in my business life - in short nothing that I feel compelled to share with folks who were once virtual strangers and whom I suspect haven't changed that much in almost  60 years witht he excption of their hairlines and waist size. Now here, we are equals.

I'd rather watch a video of a grandchild doing something really important - like learning how to explore the box their present came in - skip the reunion and just be myself with my new friends in Florida.

But, hey "Dude", it's up to you how  - or whether - you respond.