Thursday, April 7, 2011

E-MAIL SPRING CLEANING

Pithy comments strained from recent E-mails. Somebody has a good sense of humor - even if a little cracked.

"Blessed are the cracked - for they let in the light"

"I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with "Guess" on it. So, I said, "Implants?"She smacked me."

"Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference."

"My wife and I divorced over religious differences. I thought I was God - she didn't."

Sign I'd like to see: "Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere."

Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press Ctrl Alt Delete and start all over?

"I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on."

Ham and eggs. A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig!

Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in school - but they can in prison?

"When I was a kid I used to go "skinny dipping - now I just "chunky dunk."

The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.

"You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me."

(My favorite) "Ever get the feeling your stuff strutted off without you?"

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