THE IRONY OF GETTING IT WRITE!

Al Neuharth, founder of USA Today and regular Friday columnist, finally got one right.

He speaks of the miracle of being brief - both in speech and in writing. Both are talents I lack. Most people would agree with both Al and myself.

One respondent to Al's (advance) column argued for the nuances and subtlety that brevity might preclude. She's my hero - and not just because she teaches linguistics at Georgetown U.

Saving money is tough. Saving words may be even more of a challenge

It's sad, but true, that, quite often when one attempts to set the stage for the story he/she is about to relate - you've lost interest due to the excess verbiage of the set up. How they were feeling that day adds little to the content.

Then again, if you're like Tina, a friend of ours with a precious southern accent - the setup often has you howling in laughter before she makes her point. Unfortunately, that's a gift that few possess.

My favorite brevity heroes are the political cartoonists. They make their point with a couple "balloons" that have an arrow pointing to the caricature speaker.

Here are a few of my favorites:

Two panels - each containing a 24 hour news broadcaster. The first ballon reads "The Libyan tyrant has turned his guns on his people. HOW CAN OBAMA FAIL TO STEP IN?"

The second panel contains this dialogue from the same newscaster." There is no exit strategy for the intervention in Libya. HOW WILL OBAMA GET OUT?"

A second political cartoon shows a wife asking her husband, "Do you have any idea what this hidden charge is on our Verizon Wireless bill?".

The husband replies, "It's for the AT&T- Mobile merger."

A third political cartoon contains two frames with - a couple sitting on a couch facing a big screen TV with the word JAPAN in large letters.. In the first frame the husband states, "Don't worry . . it could never happen here"

The wife asks, "What couldn't?"

The husband responds, "A major disaster with absolutely no looting."

The final cartoon shows 6 people standing in groups of two - all in one frame. One couple is marked "JAPAN" and the balloon says, "we're fighting for survival". The second couple is identified as Libyan rebels. Their balloon states, "we're fighting for freedom."

The third couple is marked NFL. They are dressed in business suits and carrying briefcases. Their balloon says, "And we're fighting for ... Well.... frankly, I'm embarassed to say."

It is amazing what ironic messages you can convey using no more than 10 balloons.