YOU HAVE $500,000 SAVED - - - - -

You have $500,000 saved and you're scared of running out of money before you die?

Please help me. I want to know the name of your doctor.

Savings was the game - and Boomers were their name - in the article I just finished reading.

To be honest, I have both a wife and children who fall into the age range certified as genuine boomers - so I'm going cautiously here.

The subject of retirement is also heavy on my mind as that wife I referenced is planning her imminent retirement. We've checked with our retirement planner, the Social Security folks, and a bag lady outside of WalMart.

So, why is it that, of the 300 near-retirees and retirees in the survey, there is so much fear?

One portfolio manager when asked about the survey said, "They woke up one day to find themselves responsible for saving and investing and generating retirement income."

You got to ask, "When was that day? As they were filling out the early retirement forms?"

The simple fact is that with health care issues so prevalent, all of us have a reason to be concerned about our finances.

But overall, the article seemed to be one more example about folks who simply live in the present and must have concluded the good Reverend may have been right about last Saturday, and earth's projected demise. Thus, what's the good of planning?

I seem to recall a character in a favorite comic book/magazine whose favorite phrase was, "What? Me worry?

Apparently it caught on.

Do any of you recall the cartoon of a hearse hauling two flatbeds of expensive toys, cars, boats, golf clubs etc? The undertaker, when questioned, said, "the guy swore he was taking it with him no matter what other people insisted." He was wrong!

Here are some of the highlights from the survey:

More than one-half expressed uncertainty about their retirement funds.

Nearly half said they were distrustful of financial services and insurance firms.

(Yet) More than one-third said they did not feel comfortable making financial decisions. (H-E-L-L-O!)

Even those who have saved more than $500,000 are uncertain about how long their nest eggs will last.

Could it be time to switch from Rolex to Timex?

Please - the Sullivans are not planning an around the world cruise in the near future. Trust me, our hearts go out to those retirees, who have seen their savings exhausted. Life is tenuous.

We are not out of the woods by any means, but we did not wait until the last minute to plan our retirement. Be assured, if things don't work out as planned, the 2008 Caddy is the first thing that will go.

We made a conscious decision to downsize some time ago,(did we ever!) and sold properties that have since lost considerable value in today's market. No way we predicted that.

Still, we didn't always make the best decisions and experienced substantial life changes along the way of each other's retirement planning.

But, when you count the number of rooms in your home you have not set foot in for a couple months - you realize it's time to change things - but, first get busy ridding your house of those !@#$% dustballs.

While our decisions were ones we wrestled with for some time and the results of our decisions unsettling once made - we are glad we did.

Now, we're busy setting up new budgets and reassessing what we did when my wife was working fulltime.

Finances are much too personal to discuss in a blog. However,the only thing I want to emphasize is that we, along with many others, realized long ago that retirement would come with the need for many adjustments.

This is not rocket science. It goes clear back to Aesops Fables.

I value those memories of struggling early in my life. I recall once looking through apartment cupboards to see if between paydays we had enough Ginger Ale bottles with their 5 cent return options to go to the local drugstore to exchange them for Mulsoy to feed a lactose intolerant baby.

That's as far as my ventures into Horation Algerland will permit me to go. I have been blessed in many ways. Yet, they have a special place reserved for me in the "Stupid Decision Makers Hall of Fame".

My message is not for those boomers, retirees, and near-retirees who encountered devastating losses that could not be avoided and that, furthermore, were not a result of greed and stupidity.

But, for the others -what is it that you heard from your depression experienced relatives and survivors of WW II economies that you didn't understand - or simply discarded?

Your purchase decisions and lack of maturity have affected an entire nation,as well as countries whose names you couldn't even pronounce.(Yeah, I know. It wasn't your fault.)

And for the nearly half of you who were distrustful of financial services and insurance companies - good luck to you when you attempt to perform your own heart surgery, because you have to be Type A personality all the way.

Now, it's reality time and you are going to be amazed what you can do about your future if you sit down with your significant other, a financial planner, or an informed person to discuss what the difference is between your needs and your wants.

But, to you other guys - hold on to that 500K - I may need a loan someday.