Getting it on!

The other day my wife Phyl & I were discussing our favorite memories of when we were children. The stimulus for the discussion was a book our daughter Beth gave me for Father's Day.

The book, entitled "Between me and you, Dad", is sub-titled "A few things I've been meaning to ask."

The first section asks Dad to respond to various questions regarding his life as a kid. It is followed by five other sections, each containing more fascinating questions.

Phyl & I would recommend it to anyone who would like to communicate with their kids in an organized format - an ability I've lacked for most of my life.

Of our memories as kids, we both enjoyed talking about the times when you could dip your face in a stream and drink the water without fear. The clown in me insisted this was also the way I used to catch salamanders.

Phyl was not amused either.

When we got back on track and revved up the long time memory apparatus we really had a good time.

One thing led to another as we shared stories both old and new. We found both of us enjoyed going to a favorite remote spot by ourself to think about a heck of a lotta things. During those sojourns, usually within a mile from our respective homes, we would enjoy lying under a tree and making cloud pictures. Sometimes it would be just enjoying the solitude while tuning in to the serenity a stream flowing over small stones and objects can provide.

We did this in locales far from each other.

I'm curious if we ever saw the same cloud pictures. Phyl was doing her cloud watching in Harrisburg, PA - while I was equally occupied in Pittsburgh. Surely, the mountains between the two cities broke up the really good clouds. Naturally, I'm sure I had the best ones.

They say that too often, a married couple can forget how to talk to each other and that may be a major cause of them growing apart. Sometimes the meaningful topics get overlooked because of differing philosophies and a couple can linger too long without a "timeout" on the sensitive subjects.

If you doubt this argument, try "people watching" older couples the next time you're out at a favorite restaurant. A friend of ours used to comment about us when my wife and I were first dating, "Here's a couple who will never run out of conversation material," and you know, she was right.

Unfortunately, sometimes the conversations aren't always as much fun.

Sometimes, as we grow older, we find we have too much heaviness in our lives due to outside influences, such as the editorial pages, the negativity of others, and the various TV programs featuring "expert" panels.

We find a need to "turn off the tap" and just relax with each other; however, if you're not talking about the economy, someone's illness, the Florida heat, home improvements, chores that need to be completed, etc., what's left?

In a family with two very strong-willed people, it's been our experience that topics such as cool, clear, drinkable spring water, cloud pictures, Grandma's bosom(s), gettting those large ice chunks from the milkman, and the many funny things our respective kids did when they were young, can do much to close the gap between two people who love each other.

It's a lot like dating.

It's amazing how the gift of a simple book from our daughter could promote the reflection of so many wonderful memories.

But, that's for another Phyl & Barry conversation.